Two more days. The year is closing in two days. Started carrying dental floss. Haven’t started the habit of using them regularly. Reckon it would be nice to have it when need arises or at least it would be something different from my life a year ago. Besides the obvious fact, that is. The characters…
Category: Journal
Time off
Was very prepared to pour my heart and let my eyes flood over. Honest. Know she means well and for some strange reason, she cares for me. But over the strawberry smoothies at Exmouth market, lied and felt totally ashamed of it. No reason. Just wanted to visit you! Didn’t even recognize the chirpy voice…
Making do
Envious of babies. When they cry, they are soothed. When they cry, they receive warmth. As you grow up, your tears become a weakness. They make you choke on the chills. A month. Lost count of the days. The calendar has been flipped, torn, and tossed. Life is moving at top speed. Work keeps me…
It ended
Only now realise how easy it is to think about dying. Not so much dying, but ending life. Just to switch off the thoughts, the voices, and the hateful list of things. The list of things that you talk yourself into and can only wish to snub out as you fall through the sky. Still…
Quite simply
Can’t type with a broken nail. But here I am. Suppose this is my insignificant way to rebel, to push it to the breaking point. This Saturday is special. Am spending it alone. Well, not exactly alone as in locked in an underground bomb shelter with just cereal and a standing fan. It is a…
Easier to just go, alone
Have hit the proverbial wall. Again. Remember the marathon scene in Run Fatboy Run? Just like that, only I don’t know what will help me push through that barrier. No one is rallying behind me, no one is bidding me to move forward, am just circling in standstill. Maybe it is the lack of sugar…
From 9 to 10
When Sorencia published her blessings post 11 months ago, went through the list as part of my heart muscles clenched. Am I blessed? Generally do believe in the concept. Though there are days when I still think about my natural/accidental passing, how the process would be, and how people will cope thereafter. It is comforting…
Flight, else fight
September is the month to be left behind. This is now official. Have made a promise (almost) to be moderately or close to being satisfied with whatever life serves in the dining hall. For the major part of the year, it was a fairly simple track to cling onto. Then September came. It came and…
Can I help you?
What do you think? Not certain. Lately been unsure about many people and events. To the point of debilitating, not yet but it is driving frustration throughout. Tend to overuse “perhaps”. Can it be a way to control life situations without having real power? Likely to cast a sense of doubt and thus provide self…
Road left unturned
June is here soon. Am not prepared for it. Searching through the archives, my self-indulgent persona has always been preoccupied with the most important month of year. Life’s irony as it certainly shines, never did do much to celebrate the day publicly or privately. So really, have no idea why it is so important. Due…